after last night, ive had this feeling of guilt inside me. i knew that i had to tell you.
i realised last night that it was wrong, i didnt enjoy myself and felt ashamed. i could even feel you god, telling me that what i did wasnt right. there are some that are telling me that its not wrong, but i know that you god are telling me its not right, and i believe youre never wrong, you did guide me to your path didnt you? so i will believe.
i had that one friend to make me realise something, we are allowed mistakes. as long as you realise yourself in the end. she told me that now i realised myself and now know whats right and whats wrong. im glad that she didnt tell me and let me realise for myself. thankyou for that.
so doing the right thing comes with obstacles right? well this is one of the hardest ones that i must face. i had to tell you because i want you to know that i know it now, and i do know it was wrong.
but seeing your face, i could see that that face would become one of the many punishments i would be given if i continued like this. youre my role model, the one i look up to, the one i respect the most, the one i love and the one that means the world to me. yes seeing that face broke my heart, but now its up to me to mend it. it may not be like how it was before, but im going to try my hardest to repair the dissapointment ive just given you. please trust me that i know what ive done and i know its wrong.
big brother, if youre reading this, pray with me that from today, i will become a better person.
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